We got lots of second chances when we were young. The start of school years, especially in new schools, always mean clean slates. However, since they are given freely, we took them for granted and rarely cherished them.

In our adult years, second chances are earned and have to be fought for. Thus, every opportunity is priceless...and I'm still waiting for mine.
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It's that time of the year again, when the end is near.

Reflecting back on 2010, the year to me has been a year of the losts.  This year, I lost the strongest man in my life and I lost the feeblest man in my life.  I lost my trust in humanity, my faith in friendship, and my confidence in love.

Life is funny that way.

2011 is just around the corner. Everyone is running towards it with full speed. But me, I'm just going to walk, slowly...because I need to find hope along the way.

I finally resort to cheap blows today. An ex-friend was parading around his accomplishments today. I tried to bite my tongue...but I couldn't help it. I ended up bad mouthing him to another friend.

I know this is a cheap blow, a new low. He probably didn't deserve this. A huge part of me was kind of regretting what I did. But a little part of me was jumping up and down for joy, full of sa-tis-fac-tion.

God, please forgive me for I have sinned...after all, I'm only human.
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The frosting is rich and creamy, the cake is moist, you can actually taste the oreo in it...and, sadly, the calories go straight to my hips.

Life is funny. You pray, pray, and pray...and nothing happens. Everything becomes darker and darker...then suddenly, ping! A little facebook sign with a red spark appeared on my blackberry screen.

It's a message from a good friend from afar, who doesn't mind my fragility, giving me her hands.

I threw hope out of my life yesterday, for good, and she completely agrees with me.

Thank you, Mery Gunawan :D

- People who mind, don't matter. People who matter, don't mind-
                                           (Dr. Seus...thanks to Celly :D)

Is waiting a wrong thing?

All our lives we've been encouraged to fight for our cause, to stand up for what we believe, to pursue our dreams, to act on our plans...but what if there's nothing more that you can do?

I guess in a way, waiting is similar to betting on your favorite World Cup team. You put your bet in, then you watch, scream, plead, beg, pray, say nasty things, threaten to fry Paul...but in the end, nothing matters, because everything is up to the players, not you.

So...maybe it's not so wrong to be waiting to be saved after all.

I had a girls' night out tonight and the hot topic is the married life. In Indonesia, it's very common for girls to lose their identities, their space, and themselves when they got married.

2 real life examples:

Girl no. 1: One of the girl who planned to join our night out cancelled because her baby sitter is on leaves and her husband doesn't do babysitting. It turned out that the husband didn't feel the need to let the wife went out and had a good time with the girls because he himself doesn't hang out with his guy friends. And the reason why he doesn't hang out with his guy friends is because he doesn't have any friends. 

Girl no. 2: A friend of a friend joined our dinner a while ago. She had a 1 month baby and it was her time she went out of the house after she gave birth. When a guy friend found out about this, he said "Wow, you have a 1 month baby at home? What are you doing here then? Aren't you supposed to be breast feeding your baby? If you're my wife, I wouldn't let you leave the house at all."

Marriage is about sharing a life together, not taking someone's life. If husbands don't have friends, it doesn't mean that wives also don't have friends. Moms love their kids to death, but sometimes they need time for themselves, so they can think without being interrupted by the babies' cries. Girls are human too. We have our own lives before we meet our guys. Please don't take our lives away.

I wish every girl who got stuck in this problem can learn from girl no 2. When she heard him said that, she told him firmly, "I am a good mother. This is my first time out of the house after I gave birth. My baby is at home with my parents and the baby sitter. I have bottles of breastmilk at home. My cell phone has full battery and it's on. If anything happens, my driver is downstair ready to take me home, which is about 15 minutes from here." The guy respond was only, "whoa, ok ok, chill out".

And to be honest, I was more than ready to help girl no. 2 as my hand was already half way up, waiting for the right moment to smack the guy's head to bring him back into his senses.

After much thoughts, I've decided to revamp my blog.  Start new, clear up the old posts, tabula rasa.  I'm not really sure what I want to write in this blog, but I have started to read again.  And thus, I feel the need to start writing again...to let out some angst, some happiness, some worries, and some expectations...and definitely some opinions.  So yes, I am (well, we are) venturing into the unknowns...and the unknowns are full with possibilities :)

They are afraid of new ideas.

They are loaded with prejudices, not based upon anything in reality, but based on… if something is new, I reject it immediately because it’s frightening to me. What they do instead is just stay with the familiar.

You know, to me, the most beautiful things in all the universe, are the most mysterious. 

(Fear of the Unknown - Dr. Wayne Dyer...as quoted in Day & Night)